The choice is yours
The choice between a career at work and a career as a full time mum has rarely been clean cut. Jess Stevenson looks at the dilemma facing many new mothers.
Source: Benjamin Earwicker These figures alone are enough to make any woman think twice about leaving a job to look after a child, without adding the country’s economic downturn into the equation. In May, a poll conducted by YouGov found that the number of stay-at-home parents had fallen to their lowest level in 15 years, with only 2.2 million parents choosing to stay at home.
But flexible working may be been seen as the antidote to what many term the ‘motherhood penalty.’
Women Like Us, a London based recruitment company that matches mums with part time positions, has been working with the government to help highlight the contribution women who return to work can make. “I think we are getting the message across. That there is a huge talent pool of half a million women who want to get back to work but can’t find work that fits around their families.
“With a relatively small amount of support they can get back into work and make a huge contribution to the economy,” says director, Karen Mattison.
Mattison highlights why for some mums it’s difficult to find work: “It can depend on how long they’ve been out of the work place, what they were doing before, whether it’s transferable and whether they can find something that’s local and flexible - which is what most of our women say they want to find," she says.
Despite the gloomy picture painted by various equality reports, she is confident that things are looking up. “I think that things are really changing and that employers are recognising the benefits of flexibility. They’re really understanding that if they give flexibility, they’ll get a talented person who will be committed to the job,” she says.
But not everyone sees it this way. Sarah Jones, a mum who decided to set up her own business so she didn’t have to go back to work after having her second child, thinks flexible working is only a good idea on paper.
“There’s lots of key phrases like a work/life balance and flexible working, but practically speaking it doesn’t work like that, even if your child is ill and you’re legally allowed to go home and look after them, the reality is you’re made to feel guilty if you need to leave work at the drop of a hat,” she says.
Sarah was working as part of youth offending team when she was finally forced to stop work at 38 weeks pregnant for medical reasons. Now she runs Hullabaloo Kids, a company which organizes activity classes for pre-school kids, and does most of the work between two and eight pm – which she says fits around feeding schedules and naps.
“Nowadays you can work remotely from home, you get a fax line set up and internet access and you can pretty much do your job from home,” she says.
Motherhood certainly seems to be a good time to start your own business if the recent rise in ‘mumpreneurs’ is anything to go by.
“You’ve got that motivation of not wanting to go back into a normal work place. And so long as you pick your industry well, it’s very successful. A lot of business mums I know work in family orientated businesses. It’s just easier to do something that’s more child-centred.”
“I think there should be more onus put on a mum’s choice to stay and work at home if she wants to. Rather than encouraging her to go out to work and put her child into full time day care. Because that’s not what a lot of mums want. They’d like to work obviously, but they still want to be there for their children as much as possible,” she says.
But for some mums this isn’t an option. As a management consultant, Elizabeth Ross has a high powered career. Having just had her second child, she is unsure how long she will take for maternity leave. Compared to the banking world she had previously worked in, she sees the company she works for now as ‘women friendly,’ and highlights this as a reason not to leave because she wouldn’t find a better situation elsewhere.
“I think the business environment is too fast moving, especially if you have a client based job, it’s not like anyone is actively discriminating against you, it’s just that invariably other people build up that relationship in your absence. It’s not something you should take personally but it just happens,” she says.
Working for economic independence, Elizabeth comments that she is not comfortable being in a situation where she’s not earning her own money, but while she also enjoys her job she misses her children.
At 37 she is convinced that it would put her at a large disadvantage had she decided to leave work.
“If I were independently wealthy, I probably wouldn’t work I suppose. Neither would my husband. Coming off maternity leave I did think ‘oh god I’m missing so much of my daughter’s life.’ It is horrendous, " she says.
The financial demands laid on families are often cited as the reason mothers can’t afford not to work. In the UK where full time employees work the longest hours in the EU, according to the Sexism in the City report, rigid workplace structures are not only bad for women.
“Men get to spend less time with their families and are subject to the stereotype that caring for children is not a ‘man’s role.’ A lack of flexible working currently means 6.6 million people are not fully using their skills and experience,” it says.
Ex-teacher Caroline Wheeler discusses the dilemma between work and children
LINKS
- Read more from the Fawcett Society
- To find out about Women Like Us click here
- Access Mum’s Club for business mums